By Mark A. Taylor
“Why don”t you just talk with them?” I suggested.
She and I were discussing a married couple in the church whose attitudes would probably slow down progress on our ministry project.
“Because it won”t do any good,” she answered quickly. “I”ve discovered through the years that talking to people about some way they need to change seldom results in making the change happen.”
Even though I”ve forgotten the details surrounding this conversation, I still wrestle with this Christian leader”s conclusion.
Don”t talk to people about change? But isn”t the church in the change business? Hasn”t Paul exhorted us to “be transformed” instead of conforming to the world”s patterns of ego, pride, and self-interest (Romans 12:2)? Didn”t he say everyone in Christ “is a new creation” (2 Corinthians 5:17)? Aren”t our sermons and lessons all about moving from the old to the new?
And wouldn”t all of us prefer the freshness, beauty, and function of the new to the stale, tattered brokenness of the old?
Maybe not. Climbing out of a rut takes too much effort for some. They”d rather stay where they know the way. Even if it”s dark and stuffy, even if they can only glimpse the blue sky and imagine the fresh air above them, they won”t expend the energy to scale the walls. They”re more comfortable repeating the same paths and duplicating the same dysfunctional patterns. After all, they have plenty of company down there in the mud.
When I remember my friend”s remarks, I wonder about changes I should make but no one will tell me. What are my glaring weaknesses, embarrassing idiosyncracies, and persistent mistakes that everyone but me knows all too well?
Jackina Stark mentions a key to this problem in her essay this week. We”re transformed through the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). And that happens as we decide, on our own, to submit to the commands and ideals of God”s Word.
Years ago a mentor in ministry reminded me about the secret to change. “The only person you can change is yourself,” he said. Alas, almost four decades later, I still devote far more energy to the weaknesses of others than to strategies for my own growth.
Today, on the threshold of the new year, that”s an approach I need to change.
Author: Christian Standard
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