By Trevor Littleton
My name is Trevor Littleton. I am a pastor. I have punched a member of my church in the face. For the sake of transparency, it was more than one and I enjoyed it. I love Jesus. I love the church. I love church people. However, I must confess there are times I find more solace in the boxing ring than I have in the local congregation, as I have been wounded far more by church people than by tattooed heavyweights. My sneaking suspicion is I am not alone in this sentiment.
Ministry is hard. The prevailing challenge for every church leader is to walk the fine line of leading a congregation of mature disciples while simultaneously living in a world of unbelievers. Citing matters of isolation, political division, and stress, George Barna notes that 42 percent of pastors have considered quitting full-time ministry. Among a list of 15 reasons sighted is a pattern juxtaposing the balance of pleasing church people and leading in an unbelieving world. Underscoring this challenge is a disconnect pastors find in connecting to and relating with the unchurched. Many feel they are unable to connect with the unchurched as their social network is dominated by Christians. I need to be clear; surrounding oneself with others who share beliefs, core convictions, and Christlike maturity is a very good thing. It is true, however, that a void exists between those who are mature disciples of Christ and those who do not yet know him.
Today’s church does not have an evangelism problem. We have an intentionality problem. It is imperative that mature disciples of Christ be intentional in pursuing relationships with the unchurched. Jesus’ ministry was incarnational, showing the world he cared enough to pursue us in the muck and mire of life. He called us to “go” (Matthew 28:19-20). Yes, it is uncomfortable. Yes, it is messy. Yes, there will be hard moments and tough talks. Yes, it is incredibly challenging. And yes, it is worth it. After years of getting it wrong, I would like to discuss three practices that have made evangelism and connecting with the unchurched at our church plant successful for not only our staff, but for every member of the congregation.
Be Authentic
My wife and I began our church planting journey in 2023. For many years, I would sit in elder and staff meetings, crafting vision to reach the unchurched. I often found myself saying, “If we were a church plant, we would be doing X, Y, and Z to reach the unchurched.” I would throw out the need to immerse our team in the wild, foregoing office hours for time at coffee shops, gyms, community events, and involvement in the local schools. Finally, after 21 years of ministry, Shanna and I took the plunge, abandoning the security of working alongside good friends within the confines of functional, organized congregational ministry.
We knew God was calling us to stay in Ohio. We sat at the table and opened a map of the greater Cleveland area and began praying fervently as a family. We landed in Strongsville, a southwest suburb of the city of champions. Strongsville is home to many retired NFL players as it neighbors the Cleveland Browns corporate office and practice facility. A lifelong fan of all things Cleveland sports, I’ve grown to appreciate the movies Major League and Draft Day. In Draft Day, Kevin Costner’s character, Sonny Weaver Jr. placed a note in his pocket on the morning of the draft as a reminder of who he wanted in the draft: “VONTAE MACK NO MATTER WHAT.” While every team needs a good linebacker, this scene is a call out to leaders to stick to their convictions.
Make disciples, no matter what. We are not called to please people. We are not called to boast of our image or resume. We are not called to build well-branded kingdoms. We are called to make disciples. Jesus was many things to his disciples. Above all, he was authentic in every exchange throughout the gospels. His tone was warm and welcoming. He respected the woman at the well. He welcomed Mary Magdalene. He shared conversation with the Roman Centurion. In his authenticity, Jesus was able to connect with those who were different. Authenticity fosters an environment of connectivity. People are craving authenticity today, especially within the church.
Making disciples requires intentionality. We pursue people where they are. We behave like Jesus and become approachable, authentic, and connective. As evidenced by Philip, every interpersonal connection is an opportunity to share the gospel (Acts 8:26–40). Every first-time guest at church is a potential elder, leader, and disciple. We are surrounded by opportunity to connect people to a life-changing relationship with Jesus. Authenticity is the ability to connect with men and women who are different from us, but feel welcomed by our tone, disposition, and Christlike maturity. The connected discipler must be authentic in his or her approach to those they disciple, building a relationship and bond that engages the unchurched and shepherds them into deeper waters of faith.
Be Vulnerable
I met Joshua on a Monday afternoon in July 2023. At 6’2” and 265 pounds, he asked that I join him in the ring. I tried to remind him of our 20-year age difference, but he insisted we were “just practicing.” The first two rounds were fair, sportsmanlike, and civil. However, as is the case with many sparring sessions, once an athlete gets warmed up and feels loose, the activity increases. By the end of the fourth round, both of us fought with an intensity I’ve never experienced before in the ring. He cut my forehead and cracked my rib while I made his nose bleed. We hadn’t realized it, but as the rounds passed, a crowd of onlookers gathered around the ring. Some of them horrified, others cheering, we ended the fight and wiped the blood, sweat, and tears from our faces. Still standing in the ring, I noticed that Joshua began to weep. I asked him if he was ok, and he responded, “You’re a pastor, right?” I told him I had earned my ring name, Preacher, honestly, and he began sobbing.
“How do I make it stop?” he asked.
I took my gloves and headgear off and asked, “How do you make what stop, buddy?”
“The anger.” He wiped the blood from his nose and continued, “I was a foster kid. No one adopted me. I have been abused. I just have so much hate and even here, I can’t get rid of it.”
I looked over my shoulder, only to see the same crowd still watching. I assure you, there is nothing like having an impromptu church service in the middle of a boxing ring. I put my arm around him, “I was adopted too. I know that anger. I feel it. I’ve felt the same rage course through my veins. I’m so sorry that happened to you. But please understand, I’m proud of you. The coaches are proud of you, and your life means something to everyone in this gym. I know God has a purpose for you and I would love to talk to you more about that.” He nodded his head, hugged me, and continued to cry. Eighteen months later, I still talk to Joshua. I was there at ringside for his first fight. I still encourage him and want him to know someone is in his corner. I’ve been blessed to baptize other fighters with similar stories.
You and I are not perfect. We have questions. We have struggles. We have moments of difficulty. Evangelism and discipleship are about connecting with people. Jesus called Peter to “Feed my lambs,” which is a profoundly intimate way of interacting with new disciples (John 21: 15). It is not our job to impress others like we have it together. It is our job to empathize with those who do not, to connect with them, and lead them to Jesus. The power of evangelism is leading with vulnerability. When others see that we have struggled but overcome through Jesus, opportunities for outreach will follow.
Be Intentional
Mike didn’t like church people. A generation earlier, his mother was asked to leave the congregation as the family was too poor to wear “church clothes” and fit into the most affluent church in the community. She was bitter, hurt, and angry, talking despairingly about the faith for decades. One by one his siblings returned to church, but Mike remained bitter, harboring his mother’s sentiment. Over the years, the church began experiencing profound change and subsequent growth. New families began to attend, none of them dawning their Sunday finest.
I made it a practice to stand outside and greet every Sunday, being authentic, vulnerable, and intentional to those who needed to feel welcomed. Three weeks in a row, I noticed a middle-aged man standing across the street watching everyone park and enter the building. On the third Sunday, I approached him. I knew Mike from a funeral I had preached a year earlier, so I felt comfortable opening the conversation. “How are you?”
His arms were crossed, his face in a scowl. “I’m good, how are you?” His tone matched his facial expression. He was standing there with a purpose, and I needed to know what it was.
He was a hard man, so in respect I cut to the chase. “What’s eating at you Mike?”
“This church told my family not to return about 30 years ago. I’ve heard it was different now. I need to see it for myself.” He sighed and continued, “Has it really changed?”
I shook his hand and invited him to join us. He declined, but did attend the following Sunday. As a leadership, we knew this reputation preceded the church from situations in past decades. The congregation had a reputation of excluding others, which was a challenge we needed to overcome. The present membership had done a beautiful job in recovering, building a ministry that was loving, welcoming, and intentional. We renewed our mission, vision, and core values to pursue the unchurched with laser focus. It worked. It worked very well.
We cannot fall victim to the mundane rut of everyday routine, while living comfortably behind the golden gates of Christendom. Jesus has called us to be intentional in our mission to make disciples. Every interpersonal encounter is an opportunity to connect with the unchurched. Authenticity allows us to connect with them. Vulnerability lets us empathize and resonate with them. Intentionality delivers a clear path to lead them. We cannot make evangelism and connecting with the unchurched more complicated than it is. Look for common ground, set aside the fear, and make disciples in our day-to-day interaction. It is a time-tested success story (Acts 2:46–47).
Trevor Littleton is executive director for Kainos Leadership Network in Solon, Ohio.
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