By Michael C. Mack
“Pete, I”m leaving the church.”
“I sat still, too stunned to respond,” says Pete Scazzero, founder of New Life Fellowship Church in Queens, New York, and author of several books, including The Emotionally Healthy Church. “When a church member says, “˜I”m leaving the church,”” Scazzero continues, “most pastors don”t feel very good. But when your wife of nine years says it, your world is turned upside down.”
Scazzero says while he was a successful senior minister by external measures, he was emotionally immature, “a workaholic for God and failing at home as a husband and father.”
Through this experience, says Scazzero, “God met me in such an extraordinary way that I often refer to it as my second conversion. I finally grasped that emotional health and spiritual maturity are inseparable. Biblically, it is not possible for a Christian to be spiritually mature while remaining emotionally immature.”
Emotional maturity has been defined as the appropriate application of “emotional intelligence.” Emotional intelligence (EI or EQ) is the understanding of human emotions””your own and those to whom you relate. EQ is somewhat intangible in nature, but it is vital for leaders and anyone involved in ministry; it “affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities, and make personal decisions to achieve positive results,” says Dr. Travis Bradberry, author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0. How do you know if you have emotional intelligence? See the column, “Sure Signs You Have High EQ.” According to this list, Jesus was perhaps the highest EQ leader ever!
________
Sure Signs You Have High EQ
Dr. Travis Bradberry provides the following 18 indicators of high emotional intelligence.
“¢ You identify your emotions as they occur.
“¢ You”re curious about other people.
“¢ You embrace change.
“¢ You are aware of your strengths and weaknesses.
“¢ You”re a good judge of character.
“¢ You have a firm grasp of who you are; therefore you have a thick skin.
“¢ You know how to say no (to yourself and others).
“¢ You can let go of mistakes.
“¢ You put others first, giving and expecting nothing in return.
“¢ You hold no grudges.
“¢ You neutralize toxic people.
“¢ You don”t seek perfection.
“¢ You appreciate what you have.
“¢ You regularly rest from work, e-mail, your cell phone, and other technology.
“¢ You limit your caffeine intake.
“¢ You get enough sleep.
“¢ You stop negative self-talk in its tracks.
“¢ You don”t let anyone limit your joy.
“”Adapted from the Inc. article “Are You Emotionally Intelligent? Here”s How to Know for Sure” by Dr. Travis Bradberry. For more information, see the full article at www.inc.com.
0 Comments