By Bob Russell
One of the most intense topics in church leadership seminars these days is elder/preacher relationships. One minister said, “In our church I get the impression that it”s the preacher”s job to cast vision and the elder”s job to prevent it from happening.”
But it”s not always the elders who are to blame for conflicts with the minister. Many times the problem lies with a preacher or staff member who is lazy, unethical, controlling, defiant, or spiritually immature.
I”ve observed four ministries recently that looked impressive from the outside, but suddenly the preacher was asked to resign. People wondered, “What happened? We thought things were going well!”
The core problem was the preacher”s vision for the church got too far ahead of where the elders felt secure going. The exasperated preacher then attempted to bypass the elders and shared his vision with the entire congregation. The strained relationships were followed by clandestine meetings, and the end result was a termination of ministry.
Someone wisely observed, “If you”re one step ahead of your people, you”re a leader, if you”re three steps ahead, you”re a target.” Many young, ambitious ministers get too far ahead of the elders, and there is discord.
There is so much frustration in this area that some church leaders are searching for ways to get around it. A few have moved away from having any elders and they just have ministry teams. In some churches the paid staff are the elders and the lay elders are the preacher”s hand-selected “yes-men.”
But since the Bible specifies elders are to be the overseers, and since we are people who respect “The Book,” we need to consider how to make the biblical system work more effectively.
Acts 20:28-38, 1 Timothy 3:1-13, Titus 1:5-9, and 1 Peter 5:1-5 describe the qualifications and the duties of an elder. Those passages are in the Bible for a purpose, so we need to discover how elders and ministers can work together in order to build healthy, God-honoring churches.
Preachers can do much to build strong relationships with elders.
The preacher can facilitate ongoing discussions to define the lines of authority.
Most conflicts revolve around the question, “Who”s really in charge here?” Most congregations have two silos of leadership: the paid staff on one side and the volunteer leaders on the other. There is often a tug-of-war between the elders and staff to see who has the most influence. Many elders regard the preacher as a hired hand and try to lord it over him.
A preacher who accepted a call to a rural church tells about an elder who was a dairy farmer. He believed everyone worth his salt got up before sunrise, so around 6:00 am, after his cows were milked, he made it a practice to call his preacher to see how he was doing.
The new preacher endured that early morning indignity for several weeks until one night he was out past midnight counseling a troubled couple. When he got home he called the elder and said, “I”ve had a good day and was wondering how yours was?” The elder got the message, and the early morning phone calls stopped.
To counter the concept of a “hireling,” some larger churches have recently adopted the Carville model for their organizational structure. In this system, the preacher is regarded as the CEO and given broad parameters to cast vision, finalize the budget, and direct the church. The elders serve as a detached board of directors giving tacit approval or limited counsel to the preacher”s leadership.
The Carville model enables the church to make decisions and move forward more quickly, but it puts an inordinate responsibility on the minister and often disregards the value of combined counsel.
When I accepted the call to Southeast Christian Church, I was grateful the bylaws said the minister was considered a paid elder. First Timothy 5:17, 18 says, “The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. For the Scripture says, “˜Do not muzzle the ox while it is treading out the grain,” and “˜The worker deserves his wages.””
That is a good definition of the role of the paid preacher. I was not THE pastor of the church, but I was a pastor””one of a plurality of elders in the church. I was not subservient to the elders, but an equal member of the team. I had a vote in the meeting. My opinion was valued, and I was regarded as a colaborer with the elders in the work of Christ.
Some might expect this point to read, “The minister should help the elders come to a clear understanding of where the lines of authority are drawn.” But, in reality, even if the preacher is an elder, the discussion of authority is ongoing. Just as a godly married couple still struggles with leadership issues on occasion, in the church there are so many gray areas. The question of who”s in charge is never totally resolved.
Who determines the church”s ultimate vision? Who decides what type of building? How much money can the preacher spend without approval? What issues should be discussed with the elders, and which issues can the staff decide on their own? Those matters are unending, and the best we can do is to create an atmosphere where discussion is welcomed and each issue resolved rather than murmuring about them behind each other”s back and building up resentment toward one another. (See Matthew 18:15.)
The preacher can also exhibit a spirit of submission that conveys support and accountability.
Everyone is accountable to someone . . . or should be. It”s not biblical for elders to have a condescending attitude toward the preacher, but it”s dangerous when elders never really challenge the minister”s ideas. Elders are called overseers in the Bible; they are leaders who merit the preacher”s respect. Hebrews 13:17 admonishes, “Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.”
Most ministers are confident their ideas are best and instinctively want to be in charge. But God”s Word suggests a plurality of pastors because the cumulative wisdom of the elders is greater than the wisdom of any one person. That can be true even if the individual elders are not very gifted or impressive. If such an elder prayerfully seeks God”s will, God is able to do more than they can ask or imagine.
A submissive spirit is demonstrated in the degree of involvement in the elders” meeting. It”s wise for the chairman to set the agenda and run the meeting. If the minister dictates the agenda and dominates the discussion, capable leaders will quickly get discouraged and feel unneeded. Quality leaders need to know their input matters.
Some preachers object, “If I don”t speak up, it won”t get done.” Sometimes it”s wiser to force the elders to react by your silence. If your elders don”t lead, in the long run you don”t help them learn by taking over. Compel them to lead by your patience with them.
A submissive spirit is demonstrated by our personal attitude in disagreement. I wanted the elders to feel free to openly disagree with me without fear of hurting me. I didn”t want the elders to be yes-men. I didn”t want my neck to be the only one on the line for millions of dollars! I didn”t want my ideas to be implemented without filtering them through the elder”s wisdom.
When we relocated to our present facility and needed to shuttle people from the parking lot, I suggested we use oversized golf carts like they have at the airport to pick up people and transport them to the front door.
“Who would drive the golf carts?” one elder asked.
I said, “That”s a good job for the teenagers . . . that would get them involved.” The elders all laughed, and my vision was denied. They may have been right.
If the preacher gets defensive or angry when elders disagree with him, he discourages honest feedback because they don”t want to incur his wrath or hurt his feelings. At the same time, the capable elder regards the preacher as immature and overly sensitive and loses respect for him.
Jack Coffee was one of our most insightful and yet outspoken elders. His job as an executive with UPS was to represent management in negotiations with the Teamster”s union. While he has keen insight into church matters, Jack can be abrasive and brusque at times. I recall him looking across the table at me and saying, “You have brought some stupid ideas into this meeting but this may be the dumbest yet!”
You know what I did? I laughed with everyone else because I knew he was joking . . . partly! I responded, “Jack, that”s not true! That idea about the teenagers driving the golf carts in the parking lot was a lot dumber than this!” Everyone laughed again, proving that “a merry heart does good like medicine.” Jack is one of my best friends and we went out to get ice cream afterward.
When the elders and I disagreed, I tried not to panic or overreact. I didn”t pout or storm out when the meeting was over. They were my brothers in Christ. Brothers can say what they”re thinking without having to be too guarded, and the end result is combined wisdom.
A submissive attitude is most crucial in public statements made about the elders. When speaking about the elders to the congregation, it”s wise to avoid critical or sarcastic remarks about them. Ephesians 4:29 is sound counsel: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
A supportive, submissive spirit on the minister”s part will permeate throughout the congregation and give everyone the security of knowing there is accountability and mutual respect. Instead of speaking of my vision for the church, the preacher would do well to speak of the elders” vision for the church. Instead of, “I am asking you to respect my study time each morning,” phrase it this way: “The elders have requested that you respect my study time.”
As a result, the congregation develops respect for the elders” role, considerable pressure is taken off the preacher, and the elders feel more secure in their position. Maybe the most positive by-product of a submissive spirit is that the elders aren”t threatened by the preacher”s influence and are more likely to give him greater freedom.
Preachers say, “It”s hard to be respectful when the elders aren”t qualified and they have a condescending spirit toward me.” Granted, it”s really tough when you serve with men who don”t meet the biblical standard. But God honors those who respect the office even if the person holding that office isn”t totally qualified.
David refused to kill King Saul, saying, “It is not right for me to take the life of God”s anointed.” Saul abused his power, yet David waited for Saul to be removed and for God to promote him to the throne in his timetable.
The preacher can initiate activities beyond the monthly meeting to develop a friendship with the elders.
Meetings are necessary, but they often bring out the worst in people. Meetings can be tedious and sometimes tense. If the only time we associate with each other is in exhausting meetings, we see each other at our worst.
In a healthy church it”s essential that the elders and ministers be friends. They don”t have to be best friends, but they should have a close relationship with each other. I”ve consulted with churches where the elders have never been in the minister”s home and vice versa. That”s sad!
The minister can take the initiative to change that by inviting elders and their wives to visit in his home on occasion. Occasionally they should go out to lunch together, play golf together, or attend ball games together. Most importantly, they should pray together regularly. The primary value of retreats or visiting other churches is that you get a chance to talk informally, and you get to know each other”s heart. Then when there is disagreement in the formal meeting, there is a mutual trust that overrides the dissent and maintains fellowship.
It”s especially critical that there be a close bond between the chairman of the elders and the minister. The two should work hand in glove. Matt Chalfant, who has served as the chairman of the elders at Southeast Christian Church, says he talks on the phone to minister Dave Stone at least once every day. It”s not just about church issues; it”s about communication and nurturing a friendship.
When the apostle Paul was making his journey back to Jerusalem, his ship stopped briefly at Miletus. A few years before, Paul had ministered in the nearby city of Ephesus, so he took the initiative and requested the elders of the church come and visit him. Acts 20 records that the elders made the trip, embraced Paul, and prayed with him; and they wept together when he left. That”s the kind of loving relationship that needs to exist if the modern church wants to experience God”s blessing.
NEXT WEEK: What Elders Can Do
Bob Russell is retired from serving as senior minister with Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, Kentucky. He writes the popular weekly column, “The Living Word” for The Lookout magazine.
All around well thought out article…