Questions Parents Ask About Children and Baptism
Teresa D. Welch explores why parents and church leaders often struggle to discern when children are ready for baptism. She identifies key challenges in New Testament examples, age expectations, and the traditional idea of the “age of accountability,” then calls churches toward a better model for guiding children in faith.
- Parents often feel uncertain about evaluating a child’s readiness for baptism.
- The New Testament provides adult baptism examples but no direct model for children raised in Christian homes.
- Welch argues churches need a more complete model for talking about children, faith development, and baptism.
By Teresa D. Welch
Susan and Kevin approached me after church and asked a series of questions I had heard before. “Could you talk to our son, Nathan, for us? He told us he wants to be baptized, and we don’t know if he is ready. What do you think?”
Hearing questions about children and baptism was not uncommon in my role as a children’s minister, I regularly was asked by parents of elementary-aged children about matters of their child’s faith and readiness for baptism. However, the longer I served as a children’s minister, the more these questions concerned me.
My concern centered on the fact that these parents knew the details of their child’s scholastic achievements and athletic abilities, but they did not feel comfortable speaking to their child about his knowledge and belief in God. What prohibited these and other parents from feeling competent to evaluate their child’s faith?
As I reflected on the questions asked by Susan and Kevin, I recognized they were not alone in this dilemma. Parents, ministers, and children’s educators have been asking questions for decades about the practice of baptism as it relates to childhood. Though professors, ministers, and members of the Christian churches and churches of Christ have written numerous articles and books to explain how New Testament baptism should be practiced today, very little attention has been given to baptism as it relates specifically to children. Susan and Kevin’s questions reflected a series of problems that have hindered our churches from answering questions about baptism in childhood.
Problem One: Lack of a New Testament Example
The problem begins because the New Testament baptism narratives and commands do not provide an example or instructions for children. Those who responded on the day of Pentecost, and later to the preaching of Paul and others, did so as either Jewish converts or adult Gentiles. The household baptisms described in Acts do not give a clear indication of the involvement of any children, so they do not provide a clear model. We are left without an example of a child, having been reared in a Christian home, coming to faith through a process that began in infancy and culminating in baptism as a result of their belief, repentance, and confession.
The closest example is provided by the life of Timothy. Paul states that Timothy’s faith came from his grandmother and mother (2 Timothy 1:5), both of whom taught him Scripture from his infancy (2 Timothy 3:14, 15). However, though Paul is convinced of Timothy’s “salvation through faith in Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 3:15), no mention is made of Timothy’s baptism. Additionally, it is unclear if Timothy converted to Christianity alongside his mother and grandmother, or if he was educated in his Jewish heritage as well as the good news of Christ during his childhood.
The first problem is that the examples of baptism in the New Testament are of adults. Therefore the models for baptizing children that our churches have been using for the past century have been based in the traditions of the Restoration Movement.
Problem Two: Appropriate Age for Childhood Baptism
A few weeks ago I received an e-mail from a college friend who now serves as a senior minister. He asked a seemingly simple question: “What is an appropriate age for a child to be baptized?”
The debate about the age at which a child is capable of making a lifelong commitment to Christ also contributes to the confusion. Some encourage the baptism of children at the first signs of faith or understanding of sin. Others encourage a delay, wanting to make sure the child has developed the ability to think abstractly and has had time to develop a moral understanding of sin and guilt separate from fear of punishment.
One of my closest friends from Bible college remembers grabbing her dad’s hand and pulling him to the front of the sanctuary so she could respond to an invitation given at a church revival meeting. She was baptized that same evening at the age of 5.
Another friend was baptized at age 10, but desired to be baptized again during his years at Bible college. He recalls choosing to be baptized during his childhood because of the influence of his friend’s baptism and a desire to take the Lord’s Supper, not out of a personal commitment to Christ.
Both were raised in similar circumstances; both had Christian parents and were surrounded by good church communities, but each had different experiences and feelings about their childhood baptisms.
Some people note that our tradition strongly emphasizes believer’s baptism and rejects infant baptism, and then question why we would allow young children to be baptized. Has the practice of encouraging young children to come forward effectively only delayed infant baptism by a few years? The question remains: When does faith mature to the point that a child is no longer acting upon the faith of his or her parents, other adults, or church community? When is a child acting upon his or her own belief? What is an appropriate age for baptism?
Problem Three: The “Age of Accountability”
The phrase “age of accountability” has been used to define “a time or period of life when one is aware enough of God to respond to him.” This definition has been used within the Christian church/church of Christ tradition to equate the onset of the “age of accountability” with the appropriate time for a child to make a public confession of Christ and be baptized.
Some have connected this phrase with “each of us will give an account of himself to God” (Romans 14:12). Whether or not this connection is warranted, “age of accountability” has been used for more than a century in our churches to indicate a change in the status of a child.
According to our understanding of Scripture, children are born into a state of innocence. This status does not require any act to ensure their salvation until a time they demonstrate actions that indicate a change in status from innocence to accountability. Once a child has been identified as accountable and no longer innocent, he needs to confess Christ and submit to baptism so he might be saved. This has caused parents and church leaders to rush children into the baptismal waters, afraid that a child might be living outside the grace and favor of God.
By using this traditional view, it has been assumed God chooses an arbitrary moment in time when he moves each child’s status from innocent to that of guilt. Additionally, without any specific instructions in Scripture to help us understand at what time this “age of accountability” occurs or can be identified, the timing of this shift in status is not readily known to parents, other adults, or even the child.
Some have equated Jesus’ appearance in the Jerusalem temple courts at age 12 (Luke 2:41-50) as indicative of an appropriate “age of accountability.” Similarly the Jewish celebration of bar mitzvah/bat mitzvah occurs around the onset of puberty (age 12 or 13). At this time a child becomes responsible for bearing the weight of the Law, similar to the concept of “age of accountability.”
Others point to the fact that those under the age of 20 were not held responsible for the decisions of the nation in refusing to listen to Joshua and Caleb (Deuteronomy 1:39; Numbers 14:29, 30) and so this age should be extended into adulthood. Still others have encouraged the delay of baptism until middle adulthood, using Jesus’ own baptism at age 30 as the example to be followed (Luke 3:21-23).
Parents and other educators of children are left wondering, When does a child demonstrate she has entered the “age of accountability”? Is it when she turns a certain age, such as 12, 13, 20, or even 30?
Perhaps each child is best identified as accountable separate of her age, but rather by her actions. The questions then become the type of actions that might be indicators of accountability vs. innocence. Does a child demonstrate he is accountable based on his negative actions, such as willful disobedience or an awareness of his conscience that leads him to feelings of guilt? Or should parents look for positive indicators like a child’s curiosity about the meaning of the Lord’s Supper, an interest in reading the Bible, or expression of belief in Jesus?
Solution: A New Model
Because of the problems listed above, I suggest that our churches need a better model for our conversations about baptism in childhood. I am not advocating removing the use of the term “age of accountability” as inappropriate for the discussion of children and baptism. Instead, I would suggest it’s just not enough. If we understand children’s growth in faith as a process, similar to how they grow physically, mentally, socially, and emotionally, a new model might be helpful in understanding how to better understand a child’s faith development and preparation for baptism. A more complete and comprehensive conversation about baptism and children, though not without complication, needs to occur so our parents and churches understand how to prepare children to make this most important decision and commitment.
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1William Hendricks, “Age of Accountability” in Children and Conversion, Clifford Ingle, ed. (Nashville: Broadman, 1970), 84.
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Teresa Welch is assistant professor of Christian education at Emmanuel School of Religion, Johnson City, Tennessee.
