Sometimes It’s Better When God Says No
By David Faust
First Samuel 8 puzzles me. Something in the human heart wants to follow the crowd, so it’s not surprising that Israel’s elders wanted a king like other nations. What puzzles me is that God gave them what they wanted.
Their request was a slap in the face to the Lord, and rejecting God as their true king would bring negative repercussions for generations to come. The prophet Samuel predicted that cruel rulers would oppress Israel’s citizens and govern them harshly, but the pleas persisted and God relented. In the centuries that followed, Israel’s succession of kings produced strife and division more than prosperity and peace.
We often wonder why God says no to our prayers, but this incident raises a different question: Why would the Lord say yes to a foolish request?
HOW GOD ANSWERS—AND HOW WE RESPOND
In What the Bible Says About Prayer (College Press, 1987), Mitch Simpson lists four ways the Lord responds to our requests:
1. Direct granting. We receive what we ask for.
2. Delayed granting. God says yes, but we have to wait for the answer.
3. Different granting. God provides something different than what we ask for.
4. Denial. God says no.
Do we react to God’s answers with grateful acceptance or with frustrated second-guessing? The Hebrews begged for relief from Egyptian bondage, but once freed, they griped about the food. They demanded a king like other nations, but evil kings led to disaster. They longed for the Messiah, but when he came, “his own did not receive him” (John 1:11). Prayer isn’t just about getting what we want; it’s more about aligning ourselves with God whose ways are higher than our ways.
APPRECIATING GOD’S DENIALS
James and John (with their mom along for backup!) came to Jesus and said, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask.” Now, that’s a bold request! In response, Jesus told them, “You don’t know what you are asking” (Mark 10:35-38). Like James and John, we don’t know the full implications of our requests. God loves us too much to give us everything we ask for. I love my 4-year-old granddaughter dearly. If she asks me for ice cream, I will usually say yes—but not every day. If she asks for the keys to my car, I definitely will say no until she’s old enough to drive.
When God denies our requests, it might be because we lack wisdom, understanding, and maturity (Romans 5:3-5; James 1:2-5). Or perhaps we’re harboring doubt in our hearts (James 1:6-7). Or we’re asking with wrong motives so we can indulge selfish pleasures (James 4:1-3). Or there are broken relationships God wants us to mend first (1 Peter 3:7; Matthew 5:23-24). Or there are lessons we can learn only by developing patience and perseverance (Galatians 6:9). Or maybe someone else’s choices stand in the way of our desires (Matthew 23:37).
The apostle Paul asked repeatedly for the thorn in his flesh to be removed. The thorn remained, but God’s grace proved sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:7-10). Even when we don’t understand why God answers prayer the way he does, we can trust he always knows what is best and does what is right. There’s grace to be found whether the Lord says yes or no.
Personal Challenge: Think of a time when you requested something in prayer and God said no. What did you learn from this experience? How did it impact your faith and your relationship with the Lord?
Author: Christian Standard
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