Articles for tag: Minister’s Family

October 27, 2016

Christian Standard

The Trouble with Trying to Do a Good Job

By Angela Sanders Nothing sets up a person for failure more effectively than an intense desire to do a good job when the definition of that “good job” is vague, subjective, and a matter of public interest. I ought to know. I am a minister”s wife. For my husband, my church, and myself, I”ve wanted few things more than to wear well the title “minister”s wife.” Now, before you start tsk-tsk-ing me and pointing out problems with that statement, let me save you the trouble and admit that some of my thinking early on””and intermittently over the years””has been skewed.

January 24, 2016

Christian Standard

Protecting Your PK

By Angela Sanders I am a minister”s wife. I have the scars to prove it, but my children don”t. Not because they didn”t see. Not because they didn”t hear. Not because we lied to them. We didn”t. Hunter and Hope came through an enemy attack on their family by church members with their optimism, faith, and desire to serve the body intact. This was possible only because a few who had successfully waded through the murky waters of vocational ministry ahead of us were selfless enough to take us by the hand and teach us to survive and thrive””and maintain

January 23, 2016

Christian Standard

Birth Days, Death Days

By Chris Travis I”ll never forget the day my wife, Lindsay, called me at the office and told me she was pregnant. I had dreamed about this moment. She texted a photo of the pregnancy test, and seeing those two little pink lines felt like Christmas morning. It felt like being in love! I”ll never forget that first ultrasound: those tiny hands and that tiny profile and that tiny heart puffing away. It took my breath away. We had a hilarious plan for how we would surprise our parents. We live in New York City (we moved here to help

June 27, 2015

Christian Standard

The Softball Sermon

By Daniel D. Schantz My father had a magical way with men. In his 87 years, my father led a host of men to Christ and guided several into the ministry. I think it was because Dad was more than just a preacher. He was first and foremost a truly fine man. Like Jesus, Dad was both godly and human, and men could identify with that. On Sunday, Dad was “the preacher,” but at Friday night church softball, he was just “Ed.” On Sunday my father dressed like a prince. The navy blue suits preachers wore in the 1950s seemed

April 26, 2015

Christian Standard

Enough Is Enough

By Jay Engelbrecht Jacob never won a “Father of the Year” trophy. When his boys were young, he was scheming, acquiring. Enough was never enough. You know the story, the tragic news, weeping for his beloved Joseph. By the time he was an old, old man, he had learned. Told that Joseph was back from the dead, Jacob said, “It is enough. Joseph my son is still alive. I will go and see him before I die” (Genesis 45:28, World English Bible). Quality time. Fast-forward thousands of years. Bitterness and grief poured out of the preacher”s daughter, who loves her

November 3, 2014

Christian Standard

Are We Encouraging, or Discouraging Them?

By Larry Monroe How we respond to an applicant for our job can help or hinder his or her future in Christian service. Nowhere is this more important than with how we handle résumés and written job applications. It happens all too often””a résumé is sent in response to a posted position at a church or parachurch organization. The candidate eagerly awaits a reply, wondering what may lie in store for him in some exciting new ministry opportunity. The candidate waits, and waits, and waits. Soon he sends a follow-up note, and then he waits some more.  Too often no

August 29, 2014

Christian Standard

How Are Things at Home?

By Eddie Lowen Why are you serving on that board or with that mission? How do you decide when it”s better to say no? Have you ever heard the wife of a construction contractor brag about all the work her husband does around the house? Neither have I. Normally, Mrs. Contractor complains, “My husband does amazing improvements on other people”s houses, but it”s like pulling teeth to get him to work on our home.” Some churches have a similar dynamic. Here”s how it develops: a capable minister does good work and establishes a positive reputation. He is asked by parachurch

July 28, 2014

Christian Standard

A Conversation with Jennifer Johnson

Meet Our Contributing Editors: In this final interview of CHRISTIAN STANDARD”s contributing editors, we talk with the writer who interviewed all the others. This worker and watcher of the church talks about small churches, megachurches, and the failings and future possibilities of our movement. Tell us who you are””not a recitation of your résumé, but what makes you tick. My parents like to tell the story of coming to pick me up from the toddler”s room at church one Sunday morning and discovering me hiding under a crib, calmly looking out at everybody. That kind of sums it up””I”m an

August 12, 2013

Christian Standard

What about the Preacher”s Family?

By Dennis Bratton Fifty percent of preachers” marriages will end in divorce. Eighty percent of preachers believe pastoral ministry has negatively affected their families. Thirty-three percent say being in the ministry is an outright hazard to their family. Local churches can change this picture. Here are some simple ideas any congregation can follow to make sure their preacher”s family is an example for every family. Preachers live in a continuum of unfinished tasks. At the end of nearly every day, the preacher can think of calls he needs to return, a sermon or lesson he needs to write, someone who requires a personal visit,

August 6, 2013

Mark A. Taylor

Ministry and Family””They Go Together!

By Mark A. Taylor One of the questions late in our June BlogTalkRadio* program was, “How can a Christian leader get started with a missional approach to ministry?” All three of those interviewed””Jon Ferguson, Greg Nettle, and Jon Weece””agreed with the same principle: “Start by being a model of missional ministry with your own class and your own family.” Weece, especially, took up the family theme. “We”ve reoriented our whole life around serving other people,” he said. “It”s very normal, for example, for our kids to understand this is what we”re going to do on Tuesday nights; we”re going to

April 8, 2013

Christian Standard

Bad Weather at Home

By Charity M. Walker-Byers and John M. Walker The black clouds of church conflict too often create bad weather at home, too. These “clouds” can cause problems that become all-consuming and overwhelming, influencing every aspect of life. When the church leader loses his or her ability to separate church life from home life, the “black cloud” can consume his or her emotions, relationships, attitude, perspective, and all other aspects of human experience. When that happens, the home becomes a battleground and a source of unhappiness instead of a safe haven, a storm center instead of a safe harbor offering rejuvenation

April 7, 2013

Christian Standard

When Conflict Comes Home

By Tom Lawson So, how do you keep church conflict from impacting your home life? The short answer is you can”t. If you”re in church leadership, serious church conflict will, in various ways, impact your family life. Church leaders, however, are not alone in this. Nearly all employed adults in America experience tensions and conflicts in their workplace that, at times, spill over to impact their home life. Church conflicts have characteristics of both workplace conflicts and family feuds. They can be conflicts over power, programs, strategic direction, allocation of resources, and dysfunctional patterns of corporate communication. And some church

February 14, 2012

Christian Standard

Our Journey with Grace

By Pam Parmenter Two and one-half years ago, on our Monday-morning walk together, my husband confessed to me that he had lied to the elders of our church. Later that day, he confessed to the elders. On the next Sunday evening, he lost his job. He came home with tears in his eyes and said, “Honey, I”m so sorry. I lost my job.” I took his face in my hands and said, “Yes, but look at you. You”re clean.” In that moment, I believe God let me glimpse what he sees when we confess and repent of our sins, because

February 1, 2012

Christian Standard

The Homes Where Preachers Live

By Mark A. Taylor Most of us have heard stories or read books about preacher”s kids gone bad. We know about unwed pregnancies, unsavory addictions, and other unwise choices among young people who grew up in a parsonage. Without a doubt, the preacher”s home may face unique pressure and scrutiny. That”s why it”s appropriate for us to dedicate several posts to the problems and possibilities shared only by preacher”s kids. But I”m glad to say this week we present far more of the latter than the former. All these articles were written by preacher”s kids who are happy about their

January 31, 2012

Christian Standard

Seven Heavens

By Daniel Schantz Heaven is probably not the word my mother would use to describe the seven parsonages I lived in, growing up in the 1950s. But, being a child, I was utterly unaware of the things that drove my mother to the brink of breakdown: carpets the color of dried blood, a 10-by-10 kitchen with no windows, and one bathroom for eight people. I was much too busy having fun to notice details like that. Anywhere was Heaven to me, as long as we were all together. Thousands of stories have been written about parsonages because they are different

January 30, 2012

Christian Standard

A Preacher”s Kid”s Hopes for His Own PKs

By Shan Caldwell I was born a preacher”s son. As such, I felt it was my duty to help my dad out as much as I could. I thoughtfully provided sermon illustration fodder for the first 16 years of my life. I enlivened dull sermons by whispering or passing notes, obliging my father to interrupt his message by calling me out””by name””in front of the whole congregation. My dad may not have always appreciated my “help,” but I did (and do) appreciate growing up in a preacher”s family. My dad traveled in evangelistic work for the first six years of

January 29, 2012

Christian Standard

How to Help a Preacher’s Kid

By Charity M. Walker-Byers I am a preacher”s kid. Being a PK has influenced every part of my life. It has influenced my values, my self-concept, and my life goals. I have lived through the joys and challenges of growing up in a ministry family. I know what it is like to be proud of a father and mother who give all they have to the service of God. I also know what it”s like to have my family life centered on, and at times almost overtaken by, service to God. Growing up as a preacher”s kid taught me the

June 19, 2011

Christian Standard

The Dad Who”s Not There

By Mark A. Taylor   Life without Dad can be lethal. That”s the conclusion of Anthony Bradley, posting at WORLDmag.com last year*. According to his research, “¢ 60 percent of rapists . . . “¢ 63 percent of youth suicides . . . “¢ 70 percent of long-term prison inmates . . . “¢ 71 percent of high school dropouts . . . “¢ 72 percent of adolescent murderers . . . “¢ 85 percent of youths in prison, and . . . “¢ 90 percent of homeless and runaway children come from homes without dads. He”s talking about the

June 18, 2011

Christian Standard

Mighty Big Shoes to Fill

By Cheryl A. Moen My father”s shoes were big””huge in fact. My dad, Burdett Wakeman, wore size 15AAA shoes””a size so large and unique that every pair of shoes he purchased had to be specially ordered. And even then, they were known to arrive in two separate boxes! Dad was a preacher, and I am certain no other minister was ever introduced by Romans 10:15 more than he was. “And how can they preach unless they are sent? . . . “˜How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”” But Dad was a great sport and just

April 27, 2011

Christian Standard

Under Conviction

By Tony Twist Recently married and fresh from seminary, Suzanne and I began our ministry with East 91st Street Christian Church in Indianapolis, Indiana, in 1979. It so happened that the Billy Graham Crusade came to Indianapolis in 1980, and Suzanne was tapped to work in the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association office. One thing she learned from the crusade team was to pray over everything. So, she determined to bring this practice home. The evening we decided to have devotions together, rather than at separate times, was a beginning for us. And a disaster. As we knelt beside the bed

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