5 November, 2024

On Dancing Well

by | 17 June, 2015 | 0 comments

By Jim Tune

Reflecting on her years in the grip of alcohol addiction, author Glennon Doyle Melton said that when she finally got sober, she dreaded weddings. She would try to look busy, reapply lip gloss, and make numerous unnecessary trips to the ladies” room in order to avoid the dance floor. The dance floor, sober, was a terrifying place to be avoided at all costs.

During her drinking days, Melton was the first and last one on the dance floor. That changed during her first years of sobriety. In a post on her popular Momastery.com blog, she comments wryly, “Thirteen glasses of chardonnay doesn”t make a girl confident and sexy, but it sure makes a girl think she”s confident and sexy. Sober, though, I was too self-conscious to dance.”

Henri Nouwen used to publish some of his diaries under the title, “On Mourning and Dancing.” The title was appropriate because the diaries chronicled much of his own struggle to give public expression to what was bubbling up inside of him and, at the same time, observe a sensitive self-consciousness.

June17_JT_JNIt”s not always easy to find that delicate balance between healthy self-expression and unhealthy exhibitionism. I”ve seen just enough of Dancing with the Stars (my mother is a fan, OK?) to see how exposed and self-conscious even very famous people can be on the dance floor. For some, it is a boost to their popularity, while other “stars” only accelerate their descent into obscurity. It”s hard to dance well.

Sometimes a person”s dance step is choreographed by his or her inner struggle and by where his or her internal compass has been set: too self-aware, too cautious, too insecure, and we see a dance that is halting, self-conscious, and apologetic. But let the dancer not be self-aware enough, and we”ll see a dance that appears free and uninhibited, but ends up revealing too much.

Even the most mature and secure of us can be swayed in our moods and our actions by the affirmations and rejections we meet in our daily lives. Inside of our families, friendships, places of work, and our churches, we are constantly meeting either affirmation or rejection of some kind. For the most part we are powerless to protect ourselves against how this affects our psyche and our emotions. Lots of affirmation and we become full of ourselves. Too much rejection and we can withdraw to hidden emptiness. It”s hard to dance well.

And so we should accept this struggle as a given and not be too hard on ourselves and others. We”re human, and so we need to forgive ourselves for stumbling in our dance steps, even as we forgive others for acting out in the same ways we”ve done on life”s dance floors.

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Latest Articles

Ministry Help Wanted

Recent postings: A director of campus ministry is needed at the University of Illinois (Urbana-Champaign). Stillwater (Pa.) Christian Church is looking for both a lead pastor and a youth pastor. Lexington (Ohio) Church of Christ is seeking a full-time senior minister. Norwin Christian Church in North Huntingdon, Pa., needs a full-time worship minister. Lycoming Christian Church in Linden, Pa., is seeking a minister of children, youth, and young adults. Michigan City (Ind.) Christian Church needs a senior minister. And more . . .

Stories

By taking these symbols of Jesus’ body and blood, we announce we believe there really was a Jesus, and he really did die for us and carried all our sins down to a grave . . .

Documentary Highlights Christian Response to Pandemics

Southeast Christian Church’s “Purpose in Pandemics” is a documentary that follows the response of the church to pandemics throughout history. The “Purpose in Pandemics” website also includes a study guide for small groups and individuals.

Used of God

I soaked up Sam Stone’s wit and wisdom during our lunches together. Afterward, I’d take notes about our conversations. After hearing of his passing, inspired by his wordsmithing, I felt compelled to share just a small part of his story.

Sam E. Stone: ‘He Tried to Speak the Truth in Love’

In memory and appreciation of our former editor, Sam E. Stone, who died early this week, we share this 2011 column from Christian Standard’s archives in which Sam discussed four Scripture verses significant to his life.

Elliott Library ‘Cornerstone’ Laid

Three Bibles of historical significance to Cincinnati Christian University were the first books place on the shelves during relocation of the George Mark Elliott Library.

The Death of Evil

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. saw in minority groups’ struggles for social equality in America a parallel with Israel’s bondage in Egypt. King envisioned God’s goodness would deliver the U.S. from the evil of segregation.

Mark Scott’s Greatest Kingdom Impact

Since I first enrolled at Ozark Christian College, Mark Scott has been my kingdom hero, and I’m not the only young preacher Mark has shaped. Over his 35 years at OCC, Mark has inspired generations of students.

‘Have We Plans for 1921?’

“All the Standard asks is the opportunity to serve, and it yearns to render in 1921 the greatest, finest, and best service of its history. . . .”

CCLF Concluding Strong First Year in Greater Cincinnati

In its first full year, the Christian Church Leadership Foundation has accomplished much to ensure Christian education and resources would continue to be available to people in the Greater Cincinnati area.

News Briefs for Dec. 9

Items from Timber Lake Christian Church (Moberly, Mo.), Choateville Christian Church (Frankfort, Ky.), Johnson University, and more.

My Counsel for Young Preachers

If I were counseling an aspiring young preacher fresh out of Bible college or seminary, champing at the bit to lead in the church, I would offer these three bits of advice.

My Memories of Marshall Leggett

By Ben Merold
As I think about Marshall Leggett, who passed away on March 2 at age 90, two personal experiences keep coming to my mind . . .

Powell Quintuplets Graduating from High School

When the Powell quintuplets were born in 2001, all of Kentucky celebrated, including Southeast Christian Church, where the Powells are longtime members. Now the quints are 18 and are all headed to the same university.

Reentry: It May Be Harder Than We Think

When the COVID-19 crisis eases, I anticipate that reentry is going to be harder than some people think. Churches, especially, need to prepare for this.

November 10 Study | I Pledge Allegiance

God’s people should be crystal clear about their allegiance. They play to an audience of one. So they must be very careful of other allegiances. For the believers in the seven churches, that meant coming out from the pagan influences of the culture.

November 10 | Discovery Questions

These Discovery Questions are for use with this week’s Lookout Bible Lesson, “The Battle is the Lord’s” (Revelation 17:1-2, 6, 18; 18:1-10), by Mark Scott.

Rescued

Each of us is an individual Titanic. We may, in our pride and self-sufficiency, think that we are uniquely grand and unsinkable. But each of us has already struck the iceberg of sin. It’s only a matter of time. But wait. God has provided a lifeboat for anyone who wants to be rescued.

Reasons to Be Grateful

Let’s honor God in this season as we give thanks for our blessings, as we celebrate our salvation, and as we take the gospel to the world.

Follow Us